Saturday, 29 January 2011

Online Dating – The Final Frontier

It all started with a passing comment from my friend Sarah*. Sarah sent me an email telling me she had jumped into the deep end & started online dating. Needless to say I was shocked. And a little bit appalled. And to be honest, a little confused. Sarah is a successful & beautiful young woman of 25, what possible reason could she have for online dating?? Being the curious person I am, I naturally asked her what on earth had compelled her to do what I termed ‘nerd-dating’.

Her answer was something I wasn’t prepared for. She simply said ‘well, I’m obviously not finding any keepers the regular way’. And all of a sudden BAM!! I understood her perspective. After all doesn’t the saying go: ‘crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results’? Or something like that… I never seem to get quotes right so I’m not going to start now.

She then posed a question – “you’re relatively single at the moment, why don’t you try it and see for yourself?” and how could I say no? And from that conversation (all over email, using code words to fool our respective work filters) an experiment was born. I would create an RSVP profile and for 1 month (originally it was 2 weeks, but I wanted to get a better ‘sample audience’) go on as many dates as I could fit in to my schedule, which ended up being about 5-8 dates a week.

It turns out I was what one would term ‘extremely popular’ in the online dating scene, getting on average 500 hits on my profile a week. I put this down to good PR skills, a bit of creativity and my giant rack.

I told my closest friends what I was doing and because I am all about safety & not getting kidnapped, we implemented some safeguards. I kept them up to speed with my dating schedule, what the guys were like and what I thought of them – which eventually evolved into a spread sheet to help keep track of the men I was dating. All the men were quite varied in physical appearance, occupation, socio-economic status, nationality and age. The youngest person I went on a date with was 21 and the oldest was 40.

Basically what I found were normal people who had all come to the same conclusion ‘if we use the internet for so many other things, why not dating?’ all of them seem to have reached the same point in their lives where they realised they weren’t finding the kind of people they wanted to date in their usual circles or local pubs and needed to expand their horizons if they were going to find someone who had the qualities they were looking for in a partner.

My Online Dating – The Final Frontier series will cover the following areas:

- About online dating – a general overview
- Creating a dynamic profile that gets you noticed
- How to be a safe online-dater
- Keeping your options open & learning not to ditch your real life
- Online & date etiquette – how to knock their socks off without taking your clothes off
- FAQ’s – the questions you’ve asked & the ones you’re too shy to ask.

It’s my definitive guide on getting it on online. It is all based on my personal experience & my discussions with others about their experiences. Feel free to pop me any of your questions & I will do my best to cover as many as I can in my final chapter ‘FAQ’s'.

x Sunny x

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